The Calls They Never Answered

Heart, be ready. We have to wake up soon.

Us

There's so much to love and so much to fear.

Abstract

Ever since our world collided, I wanted to hold your hand. To know how warm it feels, to make sure you are real. But I am afraid of what might happen next; of how you would react, of how you would make me feel after that gesture. I am afraid of straying from the friendship I have started to open up to. I don’t want to lose it. But then, the more important thing, the most maybe, is that I don’t want to lose you. I don’t want to go as far as open up your heart to me, when I myself am uncertain of how to nurture such fragile feelings.


I am CONFUSED.


I envy you for being so sure, from that time you stopped me from leaving, to this present where you constantly kept me grounded, rooted to see the world through your perspective. You yourself have opened my heart: to see more, to understand better, to enjoy what is left of this life I have wasted. To embrace myself, the people around me, the friends I have, and then you—who started it all, who helped me set almost everything in place.


And I don’t want to hurt you or me, starting by holding your hand.

One Day, Without Wings

Doesn't it scare you, these  many plans we have?

The Only Consistency I Need

And if I am dreaming, let me wake to the same scenery, so I'll know how to be truly thankful I am alive.

Answers We Have None

Perhaps we would make so much more sense in outer space.

The Soft Words That Resonated

When we first met, you told me that it was better to love someone who loved you back.
Now, I wonder if it was you hoping that I would love you.
Because I did.

Louder Than Silence

I was rewired not to make anyone else worry even if it's hurting me.
And it's eating me inside.

I really need you right now.

The Hope That Something Is Good Enough

There will always be one overhanging question within me.
When we talk. When we meet.
When we laugh. When we cry.
When we part. Before we sleep.
While I am alone. While you are away.
When I close my eyes, as I listen to your voice.



"Can we make it?"

The Comfort The Sky Brings

I am sorry if you hate it. But I find solace in the rain. Soft, wordless lullabies.

When The Lights Die

And I am terrified that the next time I open my eyes, there will be an empty space where you once stood.

The Beginning After An End

I was so caught up chasing pavements, I've passed you by a million times before. But you never gave up on me, now I know where I belong.

The Distant Best

I ended up pouring my heart out to a stranger down the street, because it was you I needed, and it was you I couldn't reach.

Inane This Is Not

I miss the person I was, who could write endlessly, even on things that could be so mundane. Things have turned mechanic, all we've been doing is memorize, memorize, memorize. I rarely have time to FEEL and when I do, things get nasty - too emotional for my sake. I've been loving what I am doing, but writing has always been a part of me. Should I be blaming someone or something? Or maybe it was just me; or maybe it was me and everything else around me. Maybe. I've acquired a lot of knowledge on science and technical stuff. But I don't want to lose my heart. I just want to be able to write again.

Clearly, I am lost.

The End of the Loop

I tried running after you the other day but I got tired and tripped. I stood up from my rest and then decided to walk the other way instead.